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Deleted member 18655

Deleted member 18655

Enlightened
Jun 4, 2020
1,422
Adjustment Disorder is what I was diagnosed with today in an appt with a psychiatrist. It fits (& finally explains the tremours and twitching)!

It's my gift from the COVID Bitch Fairy. :meh:

I have another appointment in three weeks to see how my new med dose is doing. I don't feel anything on the little dose I'm on so hopefully I can either get happy or completely numb.

All day since the 2-hour consult I've been so ashamed, mortified: I told her about everyone who's left, abused or rejected me (it's quite a list and there's no one in my life who hasn't realized how bad I am and just left). And there's no term for what in me that causes everyone to leave. I've been just melting into tears on and off with all of the memories and shame.

And it's Wednesday! - when I flip out each week that my doc will drop me as a patient in the morning. Every Wednesday I go through this; tonight it's just sprinkled with flashbacks.

I'm not going to make it. :'(

We need a Bus and a Broken Heart emoji on his site!! :hmph:
(I just had to get that off my chest!) ;-)
 
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