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porcupinetree

porcupinetree

Fading in and out of misery
Sep 13, 2023
19
I've wanted to vomit on command for a while now but trying to touch the back of my throat is a bit icky for me. Are there any alternate methods that I could try? This question may seem a bit dumb but bear with me I'm an amateur lmao
 
T

Tulip<3

Student
Aug 16, 2023
111
It's not easy. I couldn't do it for a long time, now I'm bulimic and it's 2nd nature. I wouldn't recommend trying to learn how to do this. In fact 0/10 recommend, it's really messed up my body and life
 
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Kerrtu

Kerrtu

Komeetta ♊︎
May 8, 2023
474
It's not easy. I couldn't do it for a long time, now I'm bulimic and it's 2nd nature. I wouldn't recommend trying to learn how to do this. In fact 0/10 recommend, it's really messed up my body and life

I hear you. I struggled with disordered eating most of my life.

The only way I entered into remission from bulimia was when I broke my neck. I simply could not purge; I won't say it cured me, but I can no longer vomit on command.
 
T

Tulip<3

Student
Aug 16, 2023
111
I hear you. I struggled with disordered eating most of my life.

The only way I entered into remission from bulimia was when I broke my neck. I simply could not purge; I won't say it cured me, but I can no longer vomit on command.
I'm sorry you've dealt with ED's too, it becomes such a strong compulsion doesn't it? Takes over everything.
 
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Kerrtu

Kerrtu

Komeetta ♊︎
May 8, 2023
474
I'm sorry you've dealt with ED's too, it becomes such a strong compulsion doesn't it? Takes over everything.

I'm sorry you are dealing with bulimia - it is so fucking hard to stop 🫂

I started purging in grade 5 and I'd go through periods of anorexia which alternated until I was age 32 +/-

I did have brief periods where I was trying to get "healthy" though there was always this undertone of not being good enough. Not being "the perfect weight", weighing myself near obsessively, being able to simply lean forward and vomit without having to use a hand.

My father telling me I looked like shit when I'd gain a few lbs definitely didn't help the situation. My mother would try to guilt trip me that she and my step father would have to go all the way out to Long Island for a support group for parents of those with eating disorders…she would humiliate me when she'd find minute splashes of vomit on the bathroom wall. It only lead me to vomiting in bags and storing the bags in my closet.

Terrible times.

It seeps into and yes, controls just about every aspect of one's life.
 
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porcupinetree

porcupinetree

Fading in and out of misery
Sep 13, 2023
19
Ty so much I'll definitely try these out :D
Tried the salt water method, was really hard for me to swallow in one gulp, so i took several. Didn't work, it just made me nauseous and have an upset stomach. I wish i wasn't so sensitive about everything lol
 

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