UninformedLover
"We will fight it together...as a family."
- Nov 12, 2019
- 315
The abuse I have faced as a kid is now starting to manifest into my dreams and I'm unsure of what to do. I hope this isn't a reoccurring theme.
In this dream I was being held hostage in a department store and Me and the other hostages had to write a paragraph or two about a certain topic. I chose to write about two occurrences that happened to me when I was a child as it fit the topic precisely.
First I wrote about how my whole childhood I had issues using the bathroom. As a kid I always had frequent accidents I don't even know why. My mom chalked it up as just me having a weak bladder. My dad started calling me "Pee shoe" because like almost everyday in Pre-K and Kindergarten I always peed my pants.
Then I wrote about the time I accidentally soiled my pants as a child and my mom was absolutely livid for some reason. She beat me for accidentally making a mess on the floor and wouldn't allow me to clean myself up. So for a while I had to sit there in my own waste, crying and sniffling on my grandmother's room floor until I just took it upon myself to take a shower anyway. Then later one she had the nerve to say "Who told said you could take a shower?"
The second time I wrote about was when my mom beat me again for something (most likely non trivial because I actually very well behaved and even my mom continuously says so to this day.) and made me kneel on two plates of rice and hold my hands up above my head. I remember my arms hurting really bad. I told my mom I had to pee really bad but she refused to let me do so. I ended up urinating all over the floor,unto the plates of rice basically everywhere. My legs started to burn and the mixture of rice grains and pee felt like knives on my knees. I'm pretty sure she got extremely angry at me again.
We had to read what we wrote to the person holding us hostage but I couldn't pronounce a word, panicked and woke up. I felt really strange because I haven't thought about those specific instances in such a long time. I wish I could just forget all the things my mom did to me but they continue to haunt me. Forever it seems.
In this dream I was being held hostage in a department store and Me and the other hostages had to write a paragraph or two about a certain topic. I chose to write about two occurrences that happened to me when I was a child as it fit the topic precisely.
First I wrote about how my whole childhood I had issues using the bathroom. As a kid I always had frequent accidents I don't even know why. My mom chalked it up as just me having a weak bladder. My dad started calling me "Pee shoe" because like almost everyday in Pre-K and Kindergarten I always peed my pants.
Then I wrote about the time I accidentally soiled my pants as a child and my mom was absolutely livid for some reason. She beat me for accidentally making a mess on the floor and wouldn't allow me to clean myself up. So for a while I had to sit there in my own waste, crying and sniffling on my grandmother's room floor until I just took it upon myself to take a shower anyway. Then later one she had the nerve to say "Who told said you could take a shower?"
The second time I wrote about was when my mom beat me again for something (most likely non trivial because I actually very well behaved and even my mom continuously says so to this day.) and made me kneel on two plates of rice and hold my hands up above my head. I remember my arms hurting really bad. I told my mom I had to pee really bad but she refused to let me do so. I ended up urinating all over the floor,unto the plates of rice basically everywhere. My legs started to burn and the mixture of rice grains and pee felt like knives on my knees. I'm pretty sure she got extremely angry at me again.
We had to read what we wrote to the person holding us hostage but I couldn't pronounce a word, panicked and woke up. I felt really strange because I haven't thought about those specific instances in such a long time. I wish I could just forget all the things my mom did to me but they continue to haunt me. Forever it seems.
