About last night...

[maybeimalreadydead]

If anyone was up knew I was very close to probably impulsively taking my sn. I was in a very hasty place I admit. Thanks to those who took the time to listen and talk to me. I went through a hasty process of taking ibuprofen and Xanax, officially open up my sn, measured it all out and mixed, dipped my tongue to taste a little (salty) a couple times. On the chat many were concerned about its failure because of lack of prep and stuff. and then.. my gf woke up mid night calling me saying she felt something was very wrong. She is very intuitive. She talked me down.
however I see the error in my ways and I offic have ordered the meto. I'm curious how long my sn will stay "good" if I closed it well and put it back up. Given I don't know how long it'll take for my meto to arrive. But when it does.. I'll be ready.

 

[Ame]

You really seemed to be in a negative headspace earlier but I am glad that in the end you decided against impulsively taking the SN. It sounds like you've a rather strong connection with your girl friend and that she loves you very much (and I should think that you love her dearly). Stepping away from the "ledge" can be a very harrowing experience and I cannot imagine what you could be thinking and feeling right now. My understanding from your post is that you still intend to end your life, but I do hope that you will treat yourself with compassion in the coming days.

 

[SettOne1994]

i know what you did last night :D
i saw a post about storing it last night an it sayed it can go for years in a sealed space like a plastic bag. I wouldnt keep it on open air or already mixed with water it would waste very fast days to weeks

 

[maybeimalreadydead]

You really seemed to be in a negative headspace earlier but I am glad that in the end you decided against impulsively taking the SN. It sounds like you've a rather strong connection with your girl friend and that she loves you very much (and I should think that you love her dearly). Stepping away from the "ledge" can be a very harrowing experience and I cannot imagine what you could be thinking and feeling right now. My understanding from your post is that you still intend to end your life, but I do hope that you will treat yourself with compassion in the coming days.

Ame I need to thank you specifically. Helping me see that it was out of impulse. You were the first one to reach out and have so many things to say to talk me down. At the time it felt at first like you were the only one who seemed to care even however many miles away you may be. I really appreciate you.

 

[Ame]

Ame I need to thank you specifically. Helping me see that it was out of impulse. You were the first one to reach out and have so many things to say to talk me down. At the time it felt at first like you were the only one who seemed to care even however many miles away you may be. I really appreciate you.

You are so kind! You are worthy and deserve to be treated with kindness. I won't lie, I would prefer that you find something in yourself that would be enough to compel you to recover and live a full life but I also understand that you are in a great deal of pain. Suicide is a personal choice and an act that should only be done when someone is 100% certain. I hope that you will feel better and be well.

 

[maybeimalreadydead]

You are so kind! You are worthy and deserve to be treated with kindness. I won't lie, I would prefer that you find something in yourself that would be enough to compel you to recover and live a full life but I also understand that you are in a great deal of pain. Suicide is a personal choice and an act that should only be done when someone is 100% certain. I hope that you will feel better and be well.

Thank you so much