Story A life not worth living any more...

[tanshakti]

Hey everyone, Im new here but long time lurker as a guest Im greatful for what i have learned and feel heartfelt situations of community members. Here is me, with some of my random thoughts, its of of a broken heart, a confused & diseased mind , aging & deteriorating body and a lost soul. a rise and fall of a traumatic roller coaster of this life,that made me experience nine lives in one life time--from multi-millionaire to roadside philosopher like forest gump. There are no desires left or a purpose to be aspired or a future to live for. carnage of the past for current suffering, pain and loss becomes unbearable, with a prayer at each breath to leave this selfish, individualistic, capitalistic driven over populated world of despair and loneliness.

What do you fear?: losing my mind further, being broke, homeless and old age

What do you hope for?: painless assured quick exit from this life in sleep or in unconsciousness state

What will you miss?: un completed love & dreams

What will you care about before you leave?: not to be a burden in any shape or form on anyone before or after death.

here are mine Please feel free to share your thoughts on your fear, hopes and desires...

 

[finalgoodbye:(]

Hi, welcome to the community!

Fears: I will survive and deal with bad health consequences fro my attempt, not being able to go through it because of SI, people and circumstances I can't control.

Hopes: I hope my attempt will either be successful or will change my view of life in a way that will make me happy

What will I miss: my parents and my friend

 

[tanshakti]

Hi, welcome to the community!

Fears: I will survive and deal with bad health consequences fro my attempt, not being able to go through it because of SI, people and circumstances I can't control.

Hopes: I hope my attempt will either be successful or will change my view of life in a way that will make me happy

What will I miss: my parents and my friend

Thank you, fair fears relatable, what is your method ?

 

[finalgoodbye:(]

Thank you, fair fears relatable, what is your method ?

SN

 

[tanshakti]

SN

its a safe method with relatively minimal consequences from what i learned here, apart from social consequences

 

[Doll Steak]

Fears: Failing a Lethal attempt, growing old, general emotional and physical pain.

Hopes: Peaceful death, AT LEAST a semi fulfilled bucket list, true happiness...

What I would miss: Family, Friends, actual moments in life where I'm happy or okay, maybe even drugs in a strange way I guess, also music.

 

[tanshakti]

growing old with a failed lethal attempt would be brutal-- what is your method ?

 

[Ch4in3dcr0w]

Fears: Failing the attempt and being disabled forever (mental or physical)
Hopes: Peaceful and quick death, people understanding and respecting the choice i made
What i would miss: everything that could be, my cat and my family
What will you care about before you leave?: to make it as easy as possible to clean up my remains and remove my body
my method is firearm the only reason i didnt do it is that its near impossible of getting one here in my country

 

[tanshakti]

Thanks for sharing, there are methods like SN, CO and FS hanging -- have you ever considered any before. firearm although quick and lethal is hard to acquire and gruesome for it to be an option relatively,

 

[ObsidianEnigma]

Hopes: Peaceful and quick death, people understanding and respecting the choice i made

Yes, this. Couldn't say it better myself.

What would I miss:
Once in a few years, I have an amazing day / night. I am not sure how, but it feels so good, it reminds me of the past (when I wanted to live).

 

[FuneralCry]

I also just wish to painlessly cease existing, all I want is to never suffer in this torturous, futile existence ever again and I find it so dreadful how a human can suffer for so long with no limit as to how much agony they can feel just to be tortured by old age. What I fear is suffering in this existence for much longer, to me existence is an abomination that just causes harm and suffering. I find it so deeply undesirable to exist, I find it a burden to exist and I suffer simply from existing, for me existence could never be worth it, I'd always prefer to peacefully cease existing than suffer so unnecessarily in this existence that just leads to decay and death anyway and I always suffer so much from how I cannot just have the option to die painlessly in an guaranteed way.